Food Manager Pillows

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"Good For You / Bad For You"

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"The fish sticks here are very good."

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

Burger Queen: The Patriarchy is Dead.

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"Ladies first. Actually, it's safety first. But ladies are definitely a close second."

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

"How fresh is the calamari?"

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'and on the Kids' Menu, we have Cranky Pants French Toast...'

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

"I come here for the pepper."

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

Benihana style of cooking.