Food Joke Fan Gifts

"Excuse me - do these chickens get any bigger?"

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

Bangers and Mash

Filet minion

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

Lockdown casserole

Better Not Squash.

Where 'Turkey Bacon" Comes From

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

Vegetables VS Junk Food.

'YAY! PATE!'

"And your baskets include dead crickets, old socks, mice guts and toilet water."

"Here's the pub-grub you ordered"

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

Murderous Chef

'I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.' (chef shaking chicken).

'I thought a perfect martini would cover the 'well balanced' requirement of my night to cook.'

"The other waiters just spit in the food of rude customers, not in their faces!"

'So this is a kitchen!'

'Apparently, the carrot cake really is to die for.'

'I tried the new restaurant today: they have a three course menu...'

"Say hello to my little friend!"

"I try not to be picky, but this meal is a bit too sticky!"

'Whale DNA was added to my embryo and now all I crave is plankton.'

'They're not hot - my mom said they were 'chilly peppers'?'

"You're not totally useless around the house - you make a great appetite suppressant."

"You're losing your everything."

'I never see the dog complain about my cooking.'

'The hair in the soup provides fiber.'

Be aware of what your food is up to: protect yourself against snack attacks.

Suicidal Sheep: '101 Ways with Mint Sauce.'