Food Fad Philosopher T-Shirts

"I used to be a foodie. Now I'm a fussy glutton."

'I guess there are lots of rotten jobs, Gramma...I hope I don't have to clean the taco hut forever.'

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

View to the Future

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

"To paraphrase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure without pain au chocolat."

"Ma, what does 'kosher' mean?"

"I think globally, but I tend to pollute locally."

'If I order pasta and she orders antipasta, did we really order anything?'

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'

Surprise in the salad bowl

"That's a plain burger and black coffee? But what kind of plain burger and what kind of black coffee?"

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

Stratigraphy

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

'Do you think I need to eat less. Do you have a book you could recommend to tell me how?'

'Young lady, I'm afraid existential despair is no excuse for not eating your lima beans.'

'The Specials are the same as the Main Menu dishes, but with more florid descriptions.'

"What does the time traveler do when he's hungry? Go back four seconds."

"Carpe pizza"

"On second thought, just give me the ham and forget the roast beef."

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

Avocado Timeline

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

"Is it free-range?"

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

The Politics of Food.

'I've told you time and again, if you didn't east so fast, you wouldn't swallow so much flotsam.'