Food Chain Philosopher Gifts

Zoo - Animals that we eat and animals that eat us.

"I have to know who brought this disgusting eucalyptus casserole!"

"If we weren't at the top of the food chain, we'd know it."

"May I recommend Deborah, she has a perfect blend of Merlot and chocolate."

"The end is near."

'There are four species of dinosaurs son. Us Tyrannosaurs and the other three are breakfast, lunch and dinner!'

'Look at the bright side. If we were hawks it would be mice, bugs and lizards.'

'You want to become a vegan?... Well okay, but you do realise there'll be nothing lower than you on the food chain?'

It's CARNIVORE TIME!

Food Chain

'The vegie burgers are ready Darling...'

"Think about it: You're about to create fifty two orphans!"

"Would you like another santwich?"

"Apparently we're reared by people who share the values of the people who eat us."

"There's no such thing as a vegan flytrap."

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

View to the Future

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

Vegetarian Birds

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

"To paraphrase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure without pain au chocolat."

"Bob takes everything with a grain of salt...and pepper...and garlic..."

"Ma, what does 'kosher' mean?"

'If I order pasta and she orders antipasta, did we really order anything?'

Surprise in the salad bowl

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

'Do you think I need to eat less. Do you have a book you could recommend to tell me how?'

You'll be a manicotti soon enough, son - Just enjoy being a mostaccioli while it lasts.

'Young lady, I'm afraid existential despair is no excuse for not eating your lima beans.'

"On second thought, just give me the ham and forget the roast beef."

"What does the time traveler do when he's hungry? Go back four seconds."