Food And Drug Safety Follower Gifts

'The F.D.A. has recalled everything!'

would you like it with extra botulism and a touch of salmonella?

Honest Vending

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

"Please don't kill me."

'Don't worry it's organic...'

'Dorothy - we're not in the health food section anymore.'

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

"Well, okay I'll eat it. But, only if you have a medical team on stand by."

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

"According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything."

'They are boneless, I didn't say anything about beaks.'

Frankenfish

A genetically-modified,hydroponically-grown tomato conducts a taste-test of its own.

Genetically Altered Salmon (and other foods) Research

"There is nothing dangerous about GM foods!" "Keep talking or we'll smash your head in"

Genetically-Modified Foods: Are they safe?

At first, Moses was worried about the manna from heaven.

Quick, what's the five-second rule in dog years?

Food inspection results

"Is everything all right? Any reactions to the irradiated carrots, the transgenic tomatoes, or the antibiotics in the chicken?"

"What do you recommend today?"

"We can serve a rare handburger, but because of health regulations, this room will have to be heated to 160 degrees."

'Mr Bluebeard is our safety officer.'

"But for an update in GM products in farming we have a spokescarrot."

"Uncle Tod's Reviews"

Newspaper headlines - Butters kills, Margarine kills.

"Tonight's specials include beef wellington (long regarded as a major source of cholesterol and saturated fat), Cajun-style swordfish (suspected of containing PCBs and toxic metals), and chicken teriyaki (recent increase in the incidence of salmonella whi

Grim Reaper with ChipsFries.

"Are there any reports of illness at this table?"

"...and into each box, we now put a tiny amount of antidote to counteract all the additives."

"We might be in trouble – the environment people have cited us as a hazardous waste site."

'Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.'

"There's a free pudding for whoever finds the Chef's glass eye."

"He bought a thermometer for me, and I'm not even sick."