Fodder Fanatic Pillows

Counting ribs

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

Cheese

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

'So this is goodbye then!'

'For heaven's sake, Lois, when are you going to give up this mad dieting of yours?' (woman falls through drain).

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

'Must you have chips with everything Sir Francis.'

The proper term for our special promotion is Triple Cheeseburger with a Gazillion fries...not the triple bypass special!

A convenient attack of swine flu...

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

'Real hungry? Should be, 'Really hungry.' Adjectives take adverbs.'

"Of course I mind—they're mine, and I want all of them."

All work and no play makes jack a dough boy.

"Our greatest fears are confirmed, they've taken waffle fries off the menu."

"Now that's art!"

UFO = Unidentified frying object.

"I guess it's an OK job. Minimum wage plus all you can eat. I tried to quit once but couldn't get out the door."

'Look...it's almost empty! Those pesky birds need to quit stealin' the food out of this squirrel feeder!'

'Grandma makes everything from scratch! Why don't you ever buy any scratch?'

'No fair, man. How come you get a dessert fork?'

"I want you to meet these guys-they've got the hottest new stupid thing on the Internet."

"That banquet was most delicious, and yet now, somehow, once again I feel the pang of hunger.'

All You Can Eat

"Separate checks, please."

'Gosh, he looks so peaceful lying there, I almost hate to wake him up and put him in the oven.'

'Three, two, one. Stand clear.'

Cook spills food and has to open a can (tin).