Fly Fighting Enthusiast Pillows

Ed was saving a fortune on insect spray now he had discovered that flies have no natural immunity to being whacked with a rolled up newspaper.

'Yessir, Ben us fly fisherman answer to a higher calling.'

Fly Fishing

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range.

Fishermen dread the spot where the lures hang heavy from the trees like Spanish moss.

'It's the only known prevention for swine flu...Big bad wolf serum...'

'Ed missed a nice trout in that hole last week. He takes everything personally.'

"Takes the food right out of your mouth."

Vaccine

The Games Man: He spends many hours studying minute aquatic flies...which his trout very rarely eat.

Emotional Support Pest

'Let's see. One dozen red wigglers, two dozen nightcrawlers,three dozen crickets. Want flies with that?'

Grandpa gets more than he bargained for when his lawnmower takes flight as a helicopter would.

"This meal tastes just like dog crap!"

'Food fight!'

Flies up the ante!

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

Flu Vaccine.

'You've got swine flu and I think it's begun to mutate.'

Orchestra

'How long did you try before calling?'

'We're back. So how was your summer?'

'I've got'em right where I want'em.'

"This feels so familiar."

"Is this Haiku poopery?"

Pick one: ounce of prevention or pound of cure.

Basic economy

'No, you haven't missed much. Pretty well everyone called in sick.'

'Can't come in to work today. I'm in bed with a nasty bug.'

"Orange juice, 1/2 lb. bacon, dozen eggs, bread, coffee..."

Trick or Treatment.

No fly zone

'How are they biting?'

Fly Club Singer: 'Wherever I Lay My Eggs, That's My Home...'

"Here comes someone now. If we're lucky they haven't had their fly shot, or won't wash their hands!"