Flood Jokesters T-Shirts

"Well, we could just tell everyone we have an indoor pool!"

'Of course I brought the emergency flares.'

"And so if the pillage numbers don't improve this quarter, I have just one word for you: waterskis."

"Find out who's got the licensing rights for this Armageddon thing and get them on the phone - quickly."

High tide.

Hey boss, that generic soap you gave me isn't really cleaning the cups. Mind if I go get some brand name stuff? Are you insane? There's zero difference between generic and brand name products. Corporate America just cons people into thinking "you get what you pay for." Don't be a stooge, Rudy. Don't fall for it. Now get in there and scrub those cups, minion! Strike a blow for the little guy against corporate lies! Wait ... I'm very confused. Are you a right-winger or a left-winger? You mean in w

"That one's for higher-skilled plank walkers."

"I told you not to hand in that evaluation form until after we'd docked!"

The Jim Carrey of fish is a real cutup in shool!

"Oh goodie, pigs in a blanket."

"Come on, what would be the point of being a pilot fish if I couldn't wear cool pilot sunglasses?"

The mysteries of Noah's ark.

I've never seen octopi in a school. They were all expelled for making armpit noises!

'That's no oil slick Johnson.' - During whale flu season.

"Are you any good at closing a sail."

"Yes you successfully removed the trip hazard, but with hindsight..."

'I think there's something wrong with our navigational system, because judging by the icebergs, I don't think we're in the Caribbean.'

Fish Fishing in the Fisherman's Bait.

"You know a lot about global warming. When will we be able to swim up central park west?"

"Do I know every strand back there? Nahhh! What's the worst that could happen?"

"I used to have a cigarette after spawning, but I could never keep them lit."

"So kind of him to let us have the guest ark all to ourselves."

Man flashing at a periscope in the middle of the ocean

Shark Attacks

Excess Baggage: Cruise passengers can come up with some pretty amazing questions.

No kidding Frank, she had legs from here to about thirty fathoms!"

'I hate the monsoon season!'

'Are you kidding, I used to get high with Smokey all the time.'

Hey guys, where's the exit?

Climate Change Winner

"Hey! Leave some for me! You're being shellfish again, Tim!"

'Hold it, there! Prepare to be boarded.'

Ok, that's one mackerel ... You want fries with that?

'I'm not sure that's a keeper.'

'Ummm... you do know that camo doesn't actually make you invisible, right Larry?'