Flirty Philosopher T-Shirts

The Booty Call of Cthulhu

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

At the 2021 Religious Games

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

'That's your third bowl of gruel this week! What is this -- a feeding frenzy?'

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

'I respond to stimuli, therefore I ham.'

'There goes another one. Galileo, don't you have any idea what makes them do that?'

'Do you come here often?'

'How did he make the world in six days?'

"Just how many ways are there to skin a cat?"

The Meaning of Life

'I take playing footsie very seriously, Jane. You may have won the first two rounds, but let's make it three out of five.'

"You look quite presentable when you make the effort. Your ex-wife always told me you scrubbed up well."

'You're a water sign and I'm an earth sign. . .Together we're mud.'

Second-hand Slander and Innuendo £10

"Wanna go out?"

'Unlike Wall Street, with its strict rules regulating insider trading, 'Love Street' remains un-regulated, and I'm pleases to let you know now, before the official announcement, that the position of Rolf Fusco's girlfriend is open.'

"His face may be in the gutter, but his bum's looking up at the stars."

'And remember: just hold up this little green paper, and they will do whatever you want.'

"Love comes and goes, Janet, but this is true co-dependency!"

"I guess when you run out of Tooth Fairy teeth, you gotta go get a job!"

'I see you've been chasing parked cars again. Wanna talk about it?'

'What say we knock off early tonight and go to a microbrewery?'

'I had multiple personalities.'

"But Mom said to ask YOU!"

"I've tried Buddhism, Taoism, Transendental meditation, Confucionism, Theolog, Scientgology....but I've found a good hand rolled joint of homegrown works best!"

"Oh, I don't mind being called 'Reaper', it's the 'Grim' part that gets me...my name is actually Darryl and I'm a pretty happy guy!"