Flirty Foodie Gifts

Stand back - while I whip something up

"So is there a Mrs. Softee?"

"Have you ever licked cream off a woman's body?"

'Hey, honey bun!'

'And what'll you like in the morning sir?'

'Which section... gay waiters who'll flirt with you or straight waiters who'll flirt with the lady?'

'What am I wearing? A sheer satin nightgown.'

'I recommend looking down your wife's top, sir.'

When I see you I turn to jelly!

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"When you say that love is in the air, you're referring to the smells from the food trucks, right?"

'You complimented the chef on his dumplings -now he wishes to return the compliments!'

"You're the lid to my pot."

"Yes I know, and you dropped sauce on your shirt."

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

"Beanirrito"

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"You got maybe one that smells like cheese blintzes frying?"

Chef uses Harp to cut Sausages

"'Well done' lulled him into complacency."

"Excuse me, but could you ask the chef to make this a little more photogenic?"

'Hot' and 'dog' t-shirts.

"Perhaps we should cleanse our palates first?"

"I''' have the misspelled 'Ceasar' salad and the improperly hyphenated veal osso-buco."

'You're my anti-oxidant!'

Man with a pizza in 'Lover's Lane.'

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways … Open Mike Night Presents Sadie Cohen. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my ladle can reach … When feeling hungry for the crunch of crouton and ideal lettuce. I love thee to the level of every day's most quiet need ... by cheesy bread and chicken wing. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I eat of thee freely, and then, at four, 'tis goodnight. O Sizzler salad bar, how do I love thee? I'm hungry.

'My husband will order the wine. He happens to be a graduate of the 3-Second Master of Wine program.'

'I'm very impressed that you ordered the entire meal in French. Pity it's a Chinese restaurant...'

"Lumpy? Of course it's lumpy! Sweetbread soup is meant to be lumpy."

Dave's Hamburger Shop

'Are you sure you don't have any Indian blood?.'

''Romantic'? No -- but it makes me feel like having a CROISSANT!'