Flashlight Fan Gifts

"I'm doing my part to conserve electricity."

'God's teeth - it's just not the same!'

Late night teddy reading

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

'Garfield has told the oil companies to go to hell.'

Astronaut finds used firework on the moon.

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

'Just a couple more and we'll call it a day.'

"Petting, fetching, receiving belly rubs . . . It all adds to your billable hours."

'Remember our natural predators are bats, birds,frogs and kids with jars.'

"Hon, do you think it's time you took a break from the light therapy lamp?"

Professor Algarth Zag, pioneer in fire research.

"Wow, Grog, fire and drawings. This is quite an entertainment center you have here."

Portrait sweating above a fireplace

"Who wants to help me with the fireworks this year?"

"Before rising all the way to the executive suite, the fire had its modest start in the company mailroom."

"As soon as our state legalizes fireworks, gay marriage, and marijuana - I'm going to start throwing awesome parties you're not invited to."

Bath Bonfire

Donald Trump

'To be honest, I'm sorry I ever asked him for a water feature. . .'

Playing with the dog with a boomerang.

"The applications are limitless."

'This would be a lot more fun if you didn't throw like a girl.'

Man with giant firework strapped to his back has colleague light the fuse

"We'll feel pretty silly if it's downgraded to a tropical storm."

July 5...payback.

"Mom forbids me to have fireworks. She gave me this cereal instead!"

'I was on my way to see why so many people were gathered in the park when the fireworks started...'

"Is the light bothering you?"

Dog in front of fire, wearing slippers, reading paper, smoking pipe, with tea and bones. Owner says: 'Stay!'

"In case you had any doubts, Holbrook, you're fired!"

"You're right. Watching them celebrate freedom before we abduct them is fun."

'That's OK, I'm not offended: Hardly anybody knows the difference between a butterfly and a moth...'

'You call that a firecracker?'