Fix-it Wizard T-Shirts

'Your fireplace needs a flue shot.'

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

'Seriously!? ... Well it's apparent I didn't marry a handyman.'

'Well, that's fixed that.'

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

'Not only will it do the work of ten people, it will scare 40% more work out of the rest of the employees.'

'I'll take the one on the right.'

'We'll talk later, Ed, but for now we have a quick and dirty solution to your objections.'

'Well, in the hands of my husbnd it's almost as lethal as a loaded gun.'

'This is Osgood, our most essential man -- he thinks up new ways to limit warranties!'

"I'm looking for a Father's Day gift. What kind of wrench says 'I love you'?"

math faculty

'Anything need fix'n around here? I mean besides the lamp I just broke.'

Start the session by doing something unusual.

"Dad needs a Phillips screwdriver. Who's Phillip?"

'I want to buy a self help eBook. Can you help me to download it to my eBook reader?'

Handy-lion

'Vice squad - you're busted.'

I got the raise

"Have you tried switching it off and on again?"

Illogic Tree

"It's just me, the algae-eater. Mind if I tidy up a bit in here?"

Problem Solver Wanted

'Let's put it this way, your Billy is the only kid in class without his own website,,,'

"Renovating your bathroom?"

The Solution!

"And I can install the latest version of Microsoft as well as Word and 17 other applications!"

"As you insist everything must be in triplicate, meet my new secretaries."

'Thank you for calling Tech Support. Your computer is one month old. We no longer support that model. Good day.'

'As you can see, it's a bit of an emergency.'