Fitness Warrior Pillows

Lady getting her weight taken and machine exploding under pressure.

"Great. Now I have to worry about my weight."

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"I came here to get in shape, young man! What does me picking up your bar bill have to do with it?"

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

'Well, well, well...'

Muscles

"Your contents have shifted."

Be Healthy

On the back of the t-shirt...

"This feels like an accomplishment."

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

Bodybuilder pumping himself up.

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

Hot Pie Therapy

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

Man using exercise bike being chased by dog

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

"O.K. you're ready to go on to the less embarrassing weights."

Kid with 'Little Wellness Facilitator' kit

A Sticky Buns Bakery is positioned next to a gym.

"All this spinning...shouldn't this be charging our phones or something?"

"It's true: no more burpees."

Running