Workout Warriors Pillows

"Whatever."

"That's not the motivational reward I had in mind."

"I can feel the effects of these workouts already - my wallet's gotten a lot lighter."

"I'm starting to see some real definition in my abs."

Advanced aerobicizers wait till after class to aid the fallen.

'That's our group plan.'

Muscular Santa

'How do you like the new aerobics instructor?'

"To maximize your wellness, we're going to work out for two hours every day!"

Don't Forget Your 3PM Dance Break

"The trick is to bite them just after they've been to the gym: You get good, well oxygenated blood..."

"Smacked down by reality in 24 seconds."

"MMPHH. . . I said I don't think I'm built for yoga!"

"I workout so I don't have to eat kale."

"It's true: no more burpees."

'C'Mon ladies, work that bovine!'

Elevator is now equipped with stairclimber exercise machine.

'Keep fit.'

Help! Need a personal trainer to get in shape for the rat race.

Zumbie: Zumba for zombies.

"That stabbing pain in your abs -- that's your body telling you it'd rather be on the beach."

"Can we skip this one?"

"I have to get down to 125 pounds before I go back to my real gym."

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"This feels like an accomplishment."

Muscles

On the back of the t-shirt...

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."