Fitness Tracker Devotee Pillows

Body weight app on mobile

"Blood pressure 210/140. Heart rate 185. Steps taken 29. Sedentary 9.5 hours. Calories burned 19. You da man! Oh, and you're out of pork rinds." "Our classics TV marathon featuring 'Gunsmoke' will continue after..." "The unfitbit"

"I just reached 1000 jumps."

"What do you think is a good step goal for someone who's just started walking?"

"Speed reader...?"

Woman leaves a stick of dynamite on her weighing scales and runs away

"A hacker logged into my fitness tracker and stole my steps!"

My fitness tracker said I was dead but I thought I'd better get a second opinion

'Your 'guns' are very impressive Norman,but not at work.'

"Better get a move on, only 1,314,000 steps till Christmas."

'It's so much more enjoyable since we got an electric one.'

'My Dad stays in shape watching other people exercise.'

"The only way I lost a few ounces with my activity tracker was when I took it off."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? It was wearing a Fitbit?"

"Jog on!"

"It's 10000 steps a DAY, not a YEAR!"

"I got one of those new crystal ball fitness trackers-- it tells me all my future steps."

Exercise for the end of the day...

"Before you run a marathon maybe you should start with 50 yards?" Set acheivable targets.

"Thank goodness I was getting my share prices confused with my resting heart rate."

"Nice try, but I'm not counting these as your steps. I know you're jst sitting down, eating junk food and stomping your feet on the floor."

"He doesn't know I disable the cars twice a week, so he has to walk the 5 miles to work. That way he gets his steps in."

"Forget 10,000 steps. I've programmed it to help me reach 10,000 dollars a day."

"I WAS feeling fine but then the health app on my watch said I might be DEAD."

"So, let's see what your fitness band says today."

"I used to monitor the watch. Now the watch monitors me."

"It's a smartwatch. I use it to count my step."

"It's an activity monitor for people with a sedentary lifestyle. It's called 'Fatbit'."

"He'll have the salad."

"This model is great. It monitors my heart rate, vitals and counts my blessings."

'I'm downloading an exercise manual.'

"It's an Apple watch I use it to count my step."

'Fat chance!'

"Ya, ya I know. But I only have 120 more steps to reach my daily goal."

"Now that Google owns Fitbit, they know when I am sleeping, they know when I'm awake..."