Fitness Geeks Pillows

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

"It's true: no more burpees."

"Lets find another beach, this one has too much competition."

'Is this still America?'

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

'I'm looking forward to parents' night. I'm going to ask these people their diet secrets.'

'Me? I took my cardio to the next level.'

Zumbie: Zumba for zombies.

"I have to get down to 125 pounds before I go back to my real gym."

"When I was your age, I had to ride fifteen miles on a little stationary bike while disco lights flashed and E.D.M. played in the background."

Mouse on an Exercise Bike

"That's awesome that you taught him to heel, but I just want him to walk normally."

Advanced aerobicizers wait till after class to aid the fallen.

Dinosaurs ponder fad dieting prior to extinction.

'He's my personal potty trainer.'

Body Building

The locker room door suddenly swings open, and Randy is busted by a steroid-sniffing dog.

'And one, and two, and three, and don't get discouraged Manatee, and four, and five...'

If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise.

'Keep fit.'

"Croissants? Donuts? Chocolate? Good price, madame! Good price!"