Fitness Freak Gifts

The size of a man's upper body is directly proportional to the number of unresolved issues in his head.

Patient sees smiling doctor and mean-looking doctor: 'Oh, I get it ? it's the old good cholesterol/bad cholesterol routine.'

Bodybuilder pumping himself up.

"I hope you're good, Charlie. I've only played a couple of times."

"Empty again? What's going on around here anyway?"

Breathless.

Witch has Exorcise Video.

'C'mon, c'mon! I want to be the first one on the stair-climbing machine!'

Working out with heavy weights can be bad.

"All you do is binge watch."

"I just reached 1000 jumps."

In the Guru District

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My feet are killing me.'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

"Portrait of a Lady"

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

'Well, well, well...'

Businessman uses yoga moves while reviewing financial news on computer

Muscles

Turn, turn and turn.

"You're a strong, virile stallion of a man, Randy. Has anyone ever told you that?"

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

Yearbook

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

"I think I've found the most comfy jeans."

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."