Fitness Fans With A Sense Of Humor Prints

Muscle Music.

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

Keep Fit.

Old Karate Master

"Today let's work on changing channels, drinking with a mouthful of food, and yelling at the TV all at the same time."

'Much like my hairline and waistline, our numbers are trending in the wrong direction.'

"I am exercising. I'm doing some online walking around an online mall."

Check out my six pack.

"I said half-moon pose, not full moon!"

"My Doctor said I needed more exercise so I jogged down to the donut shop."

"Wanna go scroll on our phones at the gym?"

attorney at law

1) Daddy Long Legs 2) Daddy Large Pituitary.

"Reinvesting all profits from this gym into a string of donut shops is job security."

"We don't have a gym, Collins. The best I can do is let you do jumping jacks in the supply closet."

"This recliner comes with a fitness tracker."

"Year, I get a real workout with this exercise equipment. . . I'm constantly moving it out of my way!"

"Same weight as you were in high school, great....now put the other foot on the scale too!"

"No matter how much I workout, my arms still look sticks."

Aquarobics.

'The deceased was a member of their running club.'

Ok, ok, if that's what you need to meet your daily goal, we can do 21 paces instead.

"You DO know that 'Active Retirement' is an oxymoron."

Phone buff.

'That's all the runners except one. ... We'd better go check on him.'

Davy Crocket power walks into history.

"Let me guess, you're not into sports, are you?"

'The only exercise I'm getting is when I run amok.'

Broadband developments

Cardio? How am I supposed to incorporate cardio?

Fast food

'Remember, you said if you could eat all the Thanksgiving dinner you wanted, you would jog for three hours.'

We're thinking about taking a dance class. You two should join us. How about square dancing? Not with this physique. You can't stick a round body into a square dance. Maybe salsa dancing? No, whenever I do anything with salsa I get a big mess. Ballet is also on our list. That's absurd. I'll tiptoe around that idea. And there's belly dancing! No, thanks, I get plenty of belly dancing every time I go up or down the stairs.

"That's no double chin — that's a snowball!"