Fitness Consultant Gifts

Health Club: For Regular People

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"Good game."

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"This feels like an accomplishment."

Muscles

On the back of the t-shirt...

Be Healthy

'Every piece of equipment is hooked up to battery cells in the basement, and we actually sell electricity back to the power company!'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

Powerful Love.

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

Walking a dog on a treadmill.

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

Exercise Class