Fissure Finder Gifts

Ground cracking open.

"We're at the top of the food chain and rulers of all we survey. What could possibly go wrong?"

As the world emerges from the last ice age Ug & Og discuss a historic agreement to reduce CO2 emissions from woolly mammoth barbecues.

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

Mother to son, regarding stolen cake: 'I don't need to check anything with 'the boys in forensics' I know it was you.'

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

'Of course, I'm not one of those glamorous paleontologists who are all over TV these days.'

"When it's that old, you don't need to add 'A.D.' or 'B.C.'"

"Aw, Dad! I don't wanna move. I just made friends with a fossil!"

'Are you thinking what I'm thinking?'

You May Bang Your Head Here/You May Talk To Here.

Gym: Back and Forth or Going Nowhere.

'I never knew there was a common ancestor of man and chicken.'

'This isn't either a fad! -- It's a major breakthrough!'

'If you think they're confused now, just wait till they start digging up dinosaur bones'

'It looks like a beaver.' - News Item: Beaver ancestor lived alongside dinosaurs.

"Whoever said there ain't no such thing as a free lunch obviously has never circled around a highway."

Meditation: Do Not Disturb.

The best part of leaf piles... are the sticks.

'No, I haven't taken up jogging...A velociprator was after me!'

'I have to cram for a paleontology exam tonight.'

'I just want to find out where my apprentice left my favorite drill.'

'We find the defendant to be TOAST.'

"Honey, please! I can’t concentrate with you in there being married to me!"

Buried Cable

"It ain't pretty. You got a bad flap-valve leak, and your tenor drones are all gunked up. It'll be a week at least, IF I can get the parts. I do got a loaner, but she ain't much."

"ADHD is a chronic condition marked by an inability to focus attention for an extended perio. . ."

"If you want fiber, madame, I suggest you eat the menu."

"The boring bit about cricket is waiting for them to find the ball after you've hit a six."

"Sorry, but road rage is next door. This room is for people who get frustrated with their compute and take it out on their keyboards."

"He's cleaning his room because he needs some fungi and mold for his biology class."

Honey, I'm stuck in another pot-hole!

Bird Descended from Dinosaurs.

'T.Radfield Burke, chemist, is the only person in all of science who does not have a theory about the extinction of the dinosaurs.'