Fiscally Funny Gifts

"What do you mean 'It's only money'?"

"Unfortunately Daddy already owes the government about 500,000 Pokemon cards."

Is this your idea of a joke, Findlay...?

"Why yes, there was an extra five thousand dollars in my pay check last week...er...I thought it was a raise."

"Oh I have plenty of sex appeal. It's all here in my bank baalance."

'One advantage of having so many dependents is that I don't have to worry about income taxes.'

Exchange Rate Going Down the Plughole

It's 10 P.M. does anyone know what 'sequestration' means?

"I'm at that awkward stage between credit card payments and alimony payments."

'I've figured out a way to lower your income tax...give you less income.'

"The company only made a profit of $2 billion. So that raise you requested will have to wait."

Fiscal cliff

Dog Beginning For A Loan

'Even if we did skin you last year, you may not deduct your dermatologist bill this year.'

IRS, 'You filed your tax return two days late -- Why do you hate America?'

"It's the government, they've spent all our taxes and want to know if we can send them some more."

'Oh...the IRS called. Something about an audit. I told them we weren't interested.'

"Can you start the rain now? I just got hit with the luxury tax for this boat."

"Are you V.A.T. registered..?"

"At last, a country that welcomes poor refugees like me..."

Tax relief

"Think of the raising of taxes as a motivational tool to go out and make more money."

'The IRS is wondering when you might get around to filing your Federal Income Tax?'

"Bad debts, yes, but you can't deduct bad trips."

"Here's a new bill to pay...intellectual property tax!"

"Now they tell me there's a departure tax."

tax

Luck of the IRS.

I.R.S. - A non-discriminatory federal agency. We Soak rich and poor alike.

American's Funniest Tax Decuctions

Visit to the Bank Manager, "Marrying my daughter isn't the sort of security I had in mind, Harry!"

"I spent all last year totally paralyzed with indecision about a career - isn't that some kinda tax deduction?"

'Sorry to interrupt - your monastery is on fire...the IRS wants to talk to you - and something about a missing case of wine.'

"Your 'businessman's lunch' was $9.95, sir, but I had to add a 'fair share' surcharge."

'First the good news...since you earn under $400,000, you won't have to pay the millionaire's tax.'