Fiscal Year End Pillows

But under a different accounting convention ...

'I had a thought. Let's scrap everything and start a new fiscal year right now.'

VAT "Don't worry about him he's just here to deal with late payers."

"I wouldn't stand there, if I were you."

'This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up.'

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

'And that's with massaging the numbers!'

Economic Downturns

"We've had a major development this year that I'm excited to share with the employees."

"The bad news is, no raise. The good news is that your taxes are lower."

"It's swings and roundabouts – one goes up the other goes down."

The Salesman

In basket-case.

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

"So, we look to the fourth quarter as a time of healing."

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

21st century water cooler conversations.

"We're experienced an extraordinary amount of growth this year."

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

Work Parfait

'Salaries Manager. No.'

"Thank you for that summation of the charts."

What My Day Feels Like

'The good news is, we did as well as expected last quarter. The bad news is, we didn't expect to do too well.'

"Here are the new sales figures, which way up would you like them?"

'These are the end of year figures recollected in tranquility.'

"To summarize the year: we were taken over, we took over, we were taken over and we took over."

Fred wonders if he should go see what's happening in accounting.

"It's time to retire the word 'profit'."

Businessman in suit on beach with financial report and eyes cut out viewing impending storm.

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

'Not bad, Ms. Newborn. But take another crack at it, and this time remember that 'earnings-per-share' is the alter upon which all other numbers are sacrificed.'

"Before I read the financial report I have to ask... do any of you have a weapon?"

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."