First Outdoor Movie Gifts

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"Bond James, Bond."

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

Showbiz Awards

James Bond in a Snow Globe

Director/Action Man toy.

Benedict Cumberbatch

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"Don't get strung out by the way I look, don't judge a book by its cover."

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

"We just watched a hypermovie!"

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

Herman Mankiewicz

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'

'Take a few days off. Suck some necks ...'

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

Ernie Studios. Hi, Ernie. What movies are you working on? We have a script about astronauts marooned on a planet filed with talking gorillas who are in hard economic times. I think I'll call it "The Apes of Wrath"! We're casting "Reignman." The central character is a savant monarch. And we're filming a movie about a suburban town populated by women with strange, long hair ... It's called "The Stepford Weaves."

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

'He likes to power nap.'

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

"You should be sniffed, and often, by someone who knows how."

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."