First Lady Gifts

Melania Trump

"You want to go shopping in Lisbon? Honey, give me 10 seconds to sign the order to invade Portugal!"

Shepherd and eurydice

Businesswoman Empowerment

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

The Art Student.

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

Butterfly Woman

Larry's used art

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

Gender Equality

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

"We've made great progress!"

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"Talk nerdy to me."

Demure lady with gloves

International Women's Day

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

Lady of the Cake.

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Honey, I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

'You see, Brad, I'm not just a highly polished career woman.'