First Lab Visit T-Shirts

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

"The first one's just a warning."

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

"If it were painful, could I do this?"

"I hope he has skeletons in his closet."

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

Thank you for not doing research that has already been done.

'How about a toast to my breakthrough?!'

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

'Does this get me a purple heart?'

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point'. Tennyson.'

"We don't have to worry about being quiet until we're old enough to read that sign."

"I said to make a thousand CLONES."

'Igor, quit bugging me!'

"If we crunch the numbers, it should have zero calories."

'I'm growing mini human brains from stem cells.'

'I'm inventing an acid that eats through anything.'

"We're just going for a routine checkup ... they only do that operation once."

'Don't you hate it when they look BACK at you?'

"Hey, at least you got a severance package."

'Wow! Oh, wait -- It's only a Nobel consolation prize.'

"Okay, who's been messing with the copy machine?"

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

"Are you sure you're not just teaching to the test?"

'I'm trying to turn gold into gasoline.'

"At this point, we know it's addictive."

'His next appointment is on the 17th when the clock's little hand is on the two and the big one's on the nine.'

"I feel so seen right now."

"Maybe Earth's primordial soup did contain polyester."

'Hey, guys, come over here. I just discovered the telescope.'

'Dr. McWit doesn't believe in working more than 27.'

Impartial Testing: "Eeny, meeny, money, moe..."

"The search for a new painkiller has been a real headache."