Fire Pit Enthusiast Gifts

"You're right. This is much better than putting the old calendar in the trash."

Take seat. Nothing makes me happier than keeping people warm and cooking s'mores for them. Friendly fire.

Roasting the Moneybox

This "fire" invention is taking more wood than we expected. The First Cost Overrun.

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

Finally! A cure for the common cold!

Relaxing in front of a fire.

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

Professor Algarth Zag, pioneer in fire research.

'Your father's a genius kids. First he discovered fire and now marshmallows.'

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

"If history has taught us anything, it's taught us that there have been a ridiculous number of books written about history."

"Let’s not speak of this, Tommy – scouts’ honor?"

"At first I was concerned about the Earth opening up. But I was going to build a fire pit, so it actually saved me a lot of time."

They discover fire and we spend all day cooking!

Flash Cuisine

Energy Conservation Be Damned. Fred constantly prepared for Global Warming and Nuclear Winter to happen at the same time.

The man who discovered smoke

"In a late breaking news story, our TV station is on fire."

"We should have stopped these green agitators from making predictions long before their predictions came true."

"You were right, Louis. . . I was cold before, but now it's warm and toasty."

Creepy Camp Stories.

'Is the fire included?'

Ball pit

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

Scotland Yard - coal heavers singing in a public house

Bath Bonfire

"It just doesn't crackle like the one on Netflix."

Marshmallow Roast

"First camping trip, Billy?"

Bonfire

'Do you have to bring your work home with you?'

'For the life of me I can't see how cooking over a fire, bathing under a spigot and sleeping on the ground can be fun!'