Fine Taste Aficionado Gifts

Singles Night: 'No, no, it's not you, the problem's with me - it's just that I'm cursed with good taste.'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

'Do you want your zebra de la margola rare, medium or well done?'

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

"The wine has subtle hints of expensive pretension, but it's balanced nicely by the screw cap."

"How's the salmon?"

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

'In case of fire, don't panic, pay your bill then run like hell.'

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

"Expense account or regular?"

"Room for dessert, folks?"

"The chef recommends the tilapia. However, I really like the vodka."

Wordplay: Export.

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

this bordeaux speaks for itself

'George, you're supposed to be tasting the wine, not seeing what effect it has.'

"I know you've been waiting a long time, but the Pearls were here before you."

"Waiter... my entrée fell over."

"Who ordered the moose en croute?"

'The braised toucan was fine...although I found the bill a little large.'