Financially Savvy Elder Gifts

Bomers and Bummer

'Office' block tightening it's belt

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

Hell, "I think there's been some sort of mistake, I still owe my soul to the mortgage company"

"We just can't justify the expense of cheese, let alone the upkeep of the maze."

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

'It's not my childhood that traumatised me. It's the size of your bills.'

Because of our tightening budget, I had to turn off the lights at the end of the tunnel.

Sunshine Retirement Villa: Pool, Golf, Tennis and Financial Planner.

"The social conservative in me tells me to pay for dinner, but the fiscal conservative thinks we should split it."

"You were the one who said we couldn't afford a new vacuum, so stop moaning and suck harder!"

The banks shoving the earth off the wall like Humpty Dumpty.

"I hate to ask for money, but I have a lot of student loans to pay off."

"It's cut my heating bills right down."

"Don't complain to your dad about your student loans. He's still paying his off."

"In going over your retirement papers, Wilcox. I've discovered you owe your soul to the company store."

"Harold, have you reaped huge gains that you have not told me about?"

"The Chancellor insists on people getting 'advice' on what to do with their pension ports if they cash them in."

'Open wide.' 'Your wallet.'

"We put you through day-care. You're on your own now."

'The good news is that the person who stole your identity is spending a lot less money than you were.'

"Someone forgot to pay this bill so they're repossessing our furniture."

"Papi, do we have enough net financial assets to meet essential living expenses for nine months if our source of income disappears?"

'Dad, can I put my pocket money into a pension fund to protect me from the economic winter?'

Non-Profit-Organization

Display of graduation cards labeled: over $10,000 in loans; over $25,000 in loans; over $50,000 in loans; over $100,00 in loans

Staying together for the pension.

'Why don't you put your money in the Bank, instead of stuffing it under the mattress?'

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Housekeeping - No. IX and X

Baby buying shares

"Mom, if this is putting a strain on our finances, I could take a year off."

Doctor uses his stethoscope on the patient's wallet.

"If I gave you a raise, it would put you in a higher tax bracket and you would have less take home pay."

'We're returning to a more traditional form of banking.'