Financial World Critiquer Pillows

"Sorry, I'm already overstocked with souls from investment bankers."

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

'So, a bailout is like a Ponzi scheme for automakers?'

'But the good news is: with each downsizing, you qualify for frequent fired 'discount' points.'

Trickledown economics

World Financial Mafia

'If you had more criminal potential, you'd get a bonus like all the other investment bankers!'

'George, are you responsible for chopping down this here World Economy?'

"We can't all work for Goldman Sachs."

'Yes Sir, I am at this very minute passing on your recommendations for staff wage cuts to the appropriate department'

Mismanagement at the Bank of England

'We're sorry. Yesterday's report on the tax system being replaced by voluntary contributions was traced to a practical joker.'

FIRST NATIONAL BANK OF, 'It's official, sir - EVERYBODY'S overdrawn!'

Why Can't We Make Money From Our Mistakes Like Equifax?

'You're a bad credit risk so, yes, of course you can have some money.'

"If you hold it up to your ear you can hear the sloshing sound of trillions of dollars worth of unsecured debt."

'Let me get this straight, Reverend. You would now like to diversify the Church's 'No Sin' endowment to include some 'Greed'?'

"My new years resolution was to delegate more. . . so I delegated chasing unachievable targets with massively reduced resources to George."

Banks or Loansharks?

"And to add insult to injury, the CEO fired me in a sticky note."

You're suffering from the current capital scheme in this country. Me? You and other small business people work your tail off. But the hedge fund managers make billions adding nothing to the economy

"This one is obviously limited in imagination and shows no talent or enthusiasm for management..."

Done With You

'Callers will be answered in the order of their Fortune 500 ranking.'

"I'd heard banks were reluctant to give businesses money - but I didn't think it was this bad..."

Bank loans.

"Wait, sir. It's a new banking regulation -- You can't leave without depositing something."

Tax by Trump

Cyber 9/11

"Hello, sir, I'm Warren, the new employee in the fall guy department, and I look forward to a quick departure after the latest corporate scandal."

Top AIG executives agree to give back bonuses.

Chairman.

Statue of Liberty Burns Money As Flame

Just doing my bit towards breaking up the banks...

'City workers to retrain as teachers.'