Financial Critique Pillows

Alas, an accounting scandal has hit this bank - All customers will be charged $37 for this.

'So, a bailout is like a Ponzi scheme for automakers?'

'George, are you responsible for chopping down this here World Economy?'

"You're quitting? You're walking out?? Couldn't you have at least waited until I finished outsourcing the company??!"

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

Finally! There comes my most important man!

"I may need you to take the fall for the Swanson mess. So, goeth with pride."

'Our basic package is no frills, no chew toys, no extra Kibbles, and narry a pat on the head from management...'

"I can't help but think that coming here is a total waste of time"

'Let's get with it, Miss Ogden -- Spread some papers around on my desk!'

'If congress regulates obscene bonuses, isn't that a violation of the first amendment?'

Scientific Research: 'Uh...why'd it take'em 20 yeahs t' figyah that out?'

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

Trickledown economics

World Financial Mafia

'Or we can ask the government for a bailout.'

Low standard of living

"It was just a little setback - but the boss had away of making seem much larger."

Federal Department of Gimme, Gimme, Gimme!

"I'm Action Plan Man. Good luck finding someone to impliment it."

'If you had more criminal potential, you'd get a bonus like all the other investment bankers!'

"We can't all work for Goldman Sachs."

Mismanagement at the Bank of England

'What can we do to reduce our spending?'

'We're sorry. Yesterday's report on the tax system being replaced by voluntary contributions was traced to a practical joker.'

Corporate policy is that this company is now paperless. Please use hand.

"In this company, GDP stands for gree, deception and profit."

FIRST NATIONAL BANK OF, 'It's official, sir - EVERYBODY'S overdrawn!'

'Apparently many companies experience problems including: a lack of direction, poor accountability, lack of respect among members, pushing personal agendas, poor communication ...'

'I highly recommend this painting if you're into art as an investment.'

Transparency and big business.

'You're a bad credit risk so, yes, of course you can have some money.'

"If you hold it up to your ear you can hear the sloshing sound of trillions of dollars worth of unsecured debt."