Financial Puzzle Fan Pillows

'I can understand Heisenberg's equation and Schrodinger's equation for quantum mechanics but I cannot understand derivative trading.'

How should I know up or down? All I heard was the FT was 74.95.

'I sure wish there was a formula for picking the right mutual fund!'

"Next riddle without looking it up, can you tell me which is the routing number and which is the account?"

"Good morning - I'm from your bank. We'd like our house back please!"

Greece - The Black Hole

"If all countries are in debt, who's got all the money?"

"Will the current economic trend end in a whimper or a bang? For answers, let's turn to tonight's guests!"

The Apprentice: Recession Special.

'Here's where we went wrong - you applied for chapter 11, but you only qualify for chapter 6!'

Look at what your verdict is doing to my complexion!

'Make sure he doesn't turn his TV to any business news programs while he's here.'

'Think about it: If you eat me now, you won't get an egg every day...'

Piggy bank queuing at the bank.

Freddy Mac and Fannie Mae.

"Well, if everybody does it, it must be o.k."

"He's on your 'personal computer'. . . his name is Norman and he's really good at mental arithmetic."

'Just because I understand how to maintain the Heating and Cooling systems in the world's biggest buildings doesn't mean I understand the tax code.'

"We managed to make ends meet."

S.S, Eurozone in Mayday call

Chicken and egg in a waiting room: 'Who was first?'

"Liquidity is when you wake up one day to see your pension pot has vanished, then you wet yourself."

Stealth Taxman

'According to the surveys nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot...'

'Bascombe has put all his mutual fund assets into a blind trust, but it was set up so well he can't even locate it.'

'I'm afraid those shares have gone from a maturing stock to a laughing stock.'

"It seems reasonable to assume that eating the stuff won't do us any good either."

"I rolled my pension over and over and over, and now I have no idea where the hell it is."

Accounts: Kill Bills.