Financial Paradox Lover Pillows

"If all countries are in debt, who's got all the money?"

"Your resume's very impressive, but we're looking for a financial wizard."

'Massive unpredictability is absolutely certain, maybe.'

"Originally I wanted to be a stockbroker but found I fainted at the sight of money.''

How should I know up or down? All I heard was the FT was 74.95.

Man feeding fish banks with money, not food.

'I blame Iceland - it's PAYBACK!'

"Can money buy happiness? Certainly not the amount I'm paying you."

'Oh my God!! The economy's in ruins! There's no money!'

The Meaning of Life

'Your investments in sub prime mortgages have become collectors items now! Aren't you excited?'

"The scammers managed to clear out your entire pension fund."

'Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing.'

'I can understand Heisenberg's equation and Schrodinger's equation for quantum mechanics but I cannot understand derivative trading.'

"He was expecting a golden handshake."

Bank of England Suspends Gold Payments Following Run on the Banks

Cufflinks + Handcuffs = Embezzlement

The bonus is performance based. You lost lots, which resulted in big bailout. Way to go.

'...but then the Dow rallied and the blue chips began to rise...'

'He prefers smoking cash to injecting it.'

'Sorry, Rumplestiltskin, but I'm replacing you with Alan Greenspan.'

Got anything for the small investor?

Mother Hubbard 2011

"Carl had the mouth of a truck driver... Sorry, Carl, I just can't make no sense from all those words comin’ out your pie hole. A truck driver with a Ph.D. in mathematical logic."

"We managed to make ends meet."

'And they lived happily ever after - well beyond their means.'

'Ask your doctor if investing in the market is right for you.'

Actually, I'm not really a guru...

"Well, if it wasn't on Wall Street, where did you make your killing."

'I had to co-pay for the bagel.'

'How can it be insider trading if a little bird told me?'

'You have been tried and convicted of insider trading. Have you any last tips to offer before I pronounce sentence?'

Zeno Gives Directions

Stealth Taxman

Moses with the Ten Commandments on a Ski Lift