Financial Markets Buff Gifts

STRIP Hambone: Money market warning indicator

The day the stock market went UP.

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

"To summarize the year: we were taken over, we took over, we were taken over and we took over."

'Don't bother cleaning out your desk. We'll be hiring you back as a consultant for half the salary and no benefits.'

'This is where I hang out until bullishness makes a comeback.'

"He'll do anything to say in power."

Shareholders Meeting: 'Mr Kenny will now take friendly fire from the audience.'

"They've made these fund prospectuses much easier to read." Brochure states; 'Give us all your money and get lost."

'Oh, no! It's all in euros!'

'The bad news is that we lost a lot of money last quarter... The good news is that it was a record.'

Dow Jones drop

'Stand back! All he needs is an injection of long-term capital.'

"Comparing our salaries with the workers' salaries makes me cry...with laughter!"

Standard & Poor

'All those in favor of requesting a government bailout, say 'Karl Marx'.'

The symbol for the euro (?) depicted as the wheel of a wheelchair, symbolising the state of the currency

I brake for federal bailouts.

Sales Chart: Boomerangs LTD

"And this right here was our weekend in the Hamptons."

"I wouldn't stand there, if I were you."

A man is selling, 'Cameron voodoo dolls', outside of job centre.

There will be no economics report...our economics reporter got caught in the tech carnage...

"I rob from the poor and give to the rich."

"And, of course, this is when all our loose change fell out of our pockets."

'...and the Nikkei closed down on the day.'

'He'll love this cologne. It has the scent of an undervalued stock.'

Shares Nosedive