Financial Hiccup Gifts

"It's a bicycle. My dad lost our Christmas club money in Atlantic City so I won't get the rest of it until my birthday."

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

'Yo-you Ma will now raise our spirits and assuage our pain.'

"I wrote this one after my third startup failed. It’s called ‘I Got Yer App Right Here.’"

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

'Why do I get the impression that my 401(k) isn't performing well.'

"Pendleton will stay afloat no matter what!"

City Redundancies - In? Out?

Wanna talk about it?

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

'No trouble at all giving you an overdraft Mr Simkins - have mine!'

"Bad news, sir. The public isn't buying our new Pork Ala King."

"Grandma! What big medical bills you have!"

'Having the money tree has really helped out.'

The company's going bankrupt,you'll need to get someone in to bite my nails for me!

"I'm gonna ride it out!"

"Your assets will be frozen? Oh, boy, is it going to snow?"

"The economy doesn’t make me half as nervous as my kids do."

'I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you're going to get to relive the thrill of building your company up from nothing!'

'Our nest egg finally got rotten.'

Sad businessman with sinking profits

"Even after all that's happened, I feel no less regal."

'Climate change seems to be a real thing... in the past, our money was sufficient till the 25th of a month. Nowadays, it's melted away on the 15th.'

'Our 401(k) is now a 201(k).'

Easy Budget Terms Are Not That Easy.

"We'll double our chances of recovery if we buy two lottery tickets."

'One question. Now that death's over and done with, do I still have to worry about taxes?'

"That's it - we've eaten the last of the energy bills."

"They say you're a miracle worker, so I'm wondering if you could part my sea of red ink?"

'Remember you asked me to turn around the business!'

"All I did was ask it if we'll ever collect Social Security and Medicare."

'How dare you suggest that I'm running this plant into the ground.'

Moving. Mortgage payments bankrupted them. I guess "housebroken" means something different in their case.

"Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be... oh, never mind."

'Crisis'