Financial Forensics Fans Pillows

Put it through as an expense! Nobody's going to check, are they?

'Good news! Our nest egg is developing into a double yoke.'

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

Is this your idea of a joke, Findlay...?

"I've finally found a therapist who understands options."

Kids ask repetitively: 'Is the recession over yet?'

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

'This graph may need some explaining...'

'You know who's been naughty and who's been nice? -- you're not using DNA evidence, are you?'

Born to raise interest rates.

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."

'Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.'

I've checked - it goes down to the basement.

Sure, it helps to be a blood-sucking parasite, but that's not all it takes to be a stockbroker...

'Our short-term solution is money. Our long-term solution is more money.'

'Nonsense, Harry, it's my treat. I'm filing for bankruptcy tomorrow.'

Lady in Card Shop sees Sympathy Cards section with 'Bear Market', 'Falling Dollar' and 'Inflation' categories.

First United Church of Outrageously Overlimited Credit Card Holders

'What if we televise government budget hearings and make them pay-per-view?'

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."

Overdraft limit.

I am billing, therefore I am.

Businessman with two boxes: 'Nothing Ventured' and 'Nothing Gained'.

'Instead of jail time, our head of finance chose the stock option.'

'We're in good shape. Nobody understands our financial statement.'

"Humpty Dumpty had a great fall? Was he invested in emerging markets?"

'I consider myself to be a sophisticated investor. I would never invest in penny stocks. I lost all of my money investing with a brokerage specializing in nickel stocks.'

'Inadvertently, Optometrist Niles Frobe triggers the Global Financial crisis' 'You have a bad case of eyestrain. I want you to keep your eyes off the ball for a few weeks!'

'My micro is so good it's beginning to grow into the macro.'

Advent Calender.

"We're a hedge fund, Mr Marney, so I'm putting your allocation at 30% stocks, 30% bonds, and 40% bushes."

"I have this relationship with money, it's complicated."

"It covers up all the debt."