Financial Fiesta Lover Pillows

The day the stock market went UP.

Tree in Dollar Shape.

'Ho,ho,ho, but can you be more specific?'

"Your resume's very impressive, but we're looking for a financial wizard."

Help! Have to pay back a big world bank loan.

'Twenty percent bluechips, ten percent small-caps, five percent currency hedges and the remainder in cash. Get that list to Santa right away.'

Dollar Sign Christmas Tree.

'And then the bad man from the Securities and Exchange Commission and I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house down!'

'Listen, Santa. Either you repay what you owe, or we reposses Rudolph!'

'I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you're going to get to relive the thrill of building your company up from nothing!'

"Santa, snow is falling." "Sell snow!"

'Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing.'

'Last night Warren Buffett came to me in a dream and whispered in my ear, but it was just sexual.'

"He was expecting a golden handshake."

Santa using the stock exchange to keep track of stocks and bonds being good or bad as well as going up or down

'Do we have any stocks rated 'cute'?'

'We had a white Christmas but we'll be in the red until April.'

'...but then the Dow rallied and the blue chips began to rise...'

Snowman in front of IRS wears barrel

Devil-may-care loans.

'I sure thought we were done for when we flat-lined like that.'

Magnifying the Euro

'Ask your doctor if investing in the market is right for you.'

'When to sell a stock? My rule has been to do it when I'm ready to skip the country with my client's assets.'

"If you ask em this figure for cost of goods given is a little low."

Cinco de Mayo notwithstanding, drinking from the toilet was still prohibited in the Ramirez house.

Financial Christmas

'We've drunk a Christmas toast to my portfolio, now let's drink a Christmas toast to your portfolio.'

'I had to co-pay for the bagel.'

Casino

'I don't answer questions about investments. The subject is much to complicated and best left to professional advisors.'

"I've hung all the credit card bills on the tree, maybe that will stop you going to the sales."

"Trick or Treat - sorry, cash only."

Santander Bank pays out cash by mistake on Christmas Day

A man races to get his tax returns filed.