Financial Festivities Fan Gifts

'Ho,ho,ho, but can you be more specific?'

The day the stock market went UP.

Tree in Dollar Shape.

'You reached the Nervous Investor Fund's Hotline. The per share value is now 19.05, now 18.91, now...'

Help! Have to pay back a big world bank loan.

Dollar Sign Christmas Tree.

'Twenty percent bluechips, ten percent small-caps, five percent currency hedges and the remainder in cash. Get that list to Santa right away.'

"We're wasting our time. He gets them free at work."

Team Work

"You can't be serious about all these travel expenses in December!"

We only have two things to fear - fear itself and someone getting a look at our books.

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

'Till debt do us part...'

'Listen, Santa. Either you repay what you owe, or we reposses Rudolph!'

'My Dad won't let me tell what I did on my summer vacation...he doesn't want anyone to know where he set up his offshore bank accounts.'

'I've heard of cooking the books... but how did you rotisserie them and why?'

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

Advent Calender.

"Santa, snow is falling." "Sell snow!"

Santa using the stock exchange to keep track of stocks and bonds being good or bad as well as going up or down

'We had a white Christmas but we'll be in the red until April.'

"All in favor of a cap on our liability?"

'After reaching new heights, the stock market closed early due to an oubreak of acrophobia.'

"Time for thaw awkward father son talk. You know, the one about fluctuating interest rates and instability in the markets."

'You overpaid, but it's not enough to cover the 'Overpayment Surcharge Tax'.'

'We've drunk a Christmas toast to my portfolio, now let's drink a Christmas toast to your portfolio.'

"I'm the ghost of christmas past due."

"I think I finally understand inflation."

It's a joint loan, but don't tell my husband.

'Maybe so, sir, but our motto is, 'A penny saved is a lot of trouble for nothing.''

"If you ask em this figure for cost of goods given is a little low."

"Must you do that every time I say interest rates are bound to rise?"

Santander Bank pays out cash by mistake on Christmas Day

"Trick or Treat - sorry, cash only."

A man races to get his tax returns filed.