Financial Advisers Gifts

"Darling, who shall we leave our debts to?"

'I know you want financial certainty for your business. Here it is, your business is certain to fail.'

"Yes, it's 'only money'. But it was our only money!"

Worst person to invest with...

'My advice is to sell tech, buy acme cleaning supply. But what do I know? I'm just the cleaning lady here!'

'You will spend your life investing money and getting rich...then you will lose your marbles, and give it all away.'

"No, you're not putting undue financial pressure on yourself. First graders don't need to take out student loans."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

'Now that I have your attention...'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

The day the stock market went UP.

"Stock options for your thoughts."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

British savings accounts

Sen. Krupt. I don't tell constituents that we're fueling inflation. I say we're protecting consumers and thanks to us they won't have to worry about buying any cheap stuff.

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

'That's our mission statement.'

Albania and North Macedonia: entrance denied

Profit

Jack of all trades

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers