Finance Mystic T-Shirts

'... And this is Goldsmith, our futures consultant.'

"There's a lot of uncertainty out there these days. Or not. Who knows?"

"For my next trick, I shall turn four consecutive quarters of losses into a positive outlook going forward."

'Oh, wait. There's a note. It says; Fill her up with euros.'

Wall Street lights the American Dream on fire while citizens try to burn Wall Street.

School of Wizardry and Creative Accounting.

Melissa's Mark Prediction Service

'I'm a 100% consistent investor. I buy bonds when I should buy stocks when I should buy bonds.'

'The crystal ball says to buy and the 8-Ball says to sell.'

'Come back in two months the meaning of life can change, depending if the market is bullish or bearish.'

Man sees 'Palm Readings and Stock Projections' business window

"Helen, is it just the accountant in me, or am I sensing a tone of wistful melancholy and a bittersweet acceptance of the unfathomable mysteries of corporate life in those numbers?"

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

"We call out to you, please reveal yourself, oh Spirit of Innovation."

The church of our lady of wall street.

Collapse of 'Corner Men'

President Obama: 'You're saying, we go back to a cash only economy, and if that doesn't work, the barter system!'

"I once had a firm foothold in reality, but I found that it seriously undermined my ability to function as a financial market analyst."

"It's not a map of our new oil drilling sites--it's our stock price."

'Good news! The stock market is about to explode upwards on...'

'We're expecting stocks to rally but we don't know which ones and when.'

"Hurry it up, Solomon Brothers are waiting for my decision"

'Your shares are doing well... No wait, they're falling, no they're rising, no falling and rising...'

fortune teller and credit card.

"I see you getting rich because of what the gold in your rings is now bringing."

Davos Security

'I've never seen anyone move so freely between the business world and the spirit world.'

'It's not what you buy. It's when you buy.'

'I'm here to work on my company's vision.'

"most of you have met Higgins. He'll be helping us prepare for the upcoming audit."

'I'm thinking of starting a religion. What would be a reasonable initial investment?'