Finance Fairy Tale Lover Pillows

Sub-prime Bear

Piggy bank #5: carrying (colour).

"Your resume's very impressive, but we're looking for a financial wizard."

'...and then the DOW rallied six hundred points and the three bears felt like idiots...'

All I want for Christmas is a modest recovery in the GDP, along with expectations that the year-over-year growth rate will significantly improve in 2014.'

'And all the executive board members got lovely big payouts and lived happily ever after!'

Man feeding fish banks with money, not food.

'And then the bad man from the Securities and Exchange Commission and I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house down!'

'The prince and the princess lived happily ever after on their profits from capital-appreciation funds.'

"Don't forget, the market will take a sharp downturn on the stroke of midnight."

'...but then the Dow rallied and the blue chips began to rise...'

"If you believe, clap your hands. Don't let our IPO die!"

Make Your Portfolio BEARable.

'That's all for now. We'll find out if our hero emerges from Chapter 11 tomorrow.'

Business Fairy Tales.

"The stock market hit 50,000 and everyone lived happily ever after."

"It's just as easy to love a man with a pension as to love a man without one."

"Once upon a time there was a kind old bank that did not charge its customers a fee."

'My wife left me and I lost my fortune. Well, not in this order.'

Symbols of Wall St.

"I wish I was less gullible when it comes to money."

'Another golden egg Mr. Goose! At this rate you'll be a millionaire soon!'

"That's Jack from accounting. He's a magic bean counter."

'How to profit from a financial meltdown.'

'I'm sorry my Queen, but Snow White also has a much healthier portfolio than you do.'

'Ever wonder how you're going to pay off your school loan?'

'Is there any point in the little piggy going to market?'

'So the stock market hit 12,000 and everyone lived happily ever after.'

Porridge stocks are down

'Everyone lived happily ever after? Was the Stock at an all time high then, like it is now?'

'No prince meets princess, prince saves princess and they live happily ever after again. Read me something about mutual funds and IRAs.'

'The buck should start with Henderson, but we're afraid he'd embezzle it.'

Bank customers all wait in line for fortune teller.

'You used to be an investment consultant, Fred -- what should I do with this quarter I found?'