Film Appreciation Gifts

"It'll never work—you're a moviegoer and I'm a film buff."

Remake of a better film your parents saw.

'I recently saw the Maltese Falcon for the first time in years, and I didn't like it nearly as much as I expected to. Because of that, I find I'll now have to rethink my whole life.'

Couple in garden, "Look - Lawrence of suburbia."

'Every time you lose an argument, you put a horse's head on my side of the bed!'

The Adventures of Wren Tin Tin

Jacqueline Bisset caricature

Blanca Suarez caricature

Mix up at movie appreciation night.

"Don't worry. The entire firing squad graduated from the Movie Villain Henchmen's School of Shooting."

Horror film becomes reality...

Sinnerplex.

The Piano Dreams Of Home

"Ben, forget... what... I'd said about... plastics!"

Film snob.

"The 40-Year-Old Virgin Olive Oil"

'Who do you think you're kidding, Slim? — the ruby slippers are a dead giveaway!'

The Cubicle Of Dr. Caligari

"We have sparkling and still, but I'll have to ask if we have black."

The Insiders

"Housekeeping?!"

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

"Bloody hell!"

Sign in book shop window: 'Critics agree the book is much better than the movie.'

"That was totally....what's the word I'm looking for?"

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

"I'm the bad guy..."

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"