Filing Taxes Pillows

Me Doing My Taxes

"Sorry, folks, but I'll have to see your tax return."

Tax Returns R Us - 'Sign here but don't press too hard. The desk is inflatable.'

The Buck Stops here.

"E. R., ACME Accounting: 11:57 P.M., April 14th"

Tax Preparer Pleases A Circus Ringmaster

The New Simplified Tax Return!...Step 1: Calculate income from all sources...Step 2: Send it.

"Oh, no. Death AND taxes."

'Oh...the IRS called. Something about an audit. I told them we weren't interested.'

I'm afraid neatness doesn't count, Mrs Wilson

Everybody pays taxes.

'Income tax prepared here!'

"This pesky decimal point seems to give you quite a bit of trouble."

"Can you hack into the IRS and give me a bigger refund?"

IRS: 'Life isn't fair.' - John F. Kennedy

'You'd be grouchy too if you awoke from a nice long nap and had to file income taxes.'

'Excuse my maths won't you?'

Come in, Mr. Hancock - I've just been reading you tax return.

No dependents, no deductions, no credits.... It doesn't get any better than this!

'Sorry, but you can't count them as dependents before they hatch.'

IRS. 'You added penalties and interest all right, but you forgot to include inflation.'

"Hey, Fred, Joan, Les, Harry, Debbie, Doris, Sid, come and listen to THIS!

'I'd sort of like to simplify my life myself, but I resent the government doing it!'

IRS, 'You filed your tax return two days late -- Why do you hate America?'

IRS, 'Here's your refund, sir, minus postage and handling.'

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

In/Out/These Things Happen.

'I'll be late for dinner, dear, I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

'Please put that confusing mess of documents, files and folders where it belongs...in your computer.'

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

'Marsha, did you file the Peterson account on the cumulus, stratus, cirrus, or nimbus cloud?'

'The job calls for a little filing now and then...'

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'