Festivities Gifts

Christmas Puppy Bow

"If they fit, we can return them."

"Rabbi Mandelbaum?"

Valentines Balloons

"What a Christmas! First the North Pole melts, then all the elves get laid off."

'I understand that you only use your vehicle once a year, Mr. Claus, but you drive over a million miles that night. That's why your premium is so high.'

'He's hurt his back.'

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"It's Lyme disease again."

"No, you definitely wouldn't get Christmas Eve off."

'After that 24 hour beer and fruit cake binge, you need a radical detox!'

"That was fun. Let's do it all again in three weeks."

Santa-Can at the North Pole.

"You must contact everyone who's ever been on your naughty/nice list."

Santa Claus in driverless sleigh

'Sometimes Rudolph, I can't help but feel Christmas is getting too complicated!'

"Oh, we're just here for the party."

"Happy Christmas and a prospersous New Year!"

Merry Old Santa Claus

"All done with that holiday spirit for another year, are we dear?"

'The good news is, I got your Mum's cardigan.'

Santa Claus standing and posing with a group of misfit reindeer.

'Yeah, me, too — I gained it all back over the holidays.'

"I've gained ten pounds!" "Isn't that what the turkey weighed?"

Santa twiddles his thumbs as he waits for Christmas.

A football player catching a turkey

"I'm just sayin', Boss, maybe you should lay off the cookies and milk for a while!"

'I've made up my Christmas list, too. . . 1) For someone to clean up his room. 2) Hang up his clothes. . .'

'According to this, they're suing you for illegal entry and the theft of one mince pie and a glass of sherry.'

"What do I want for Christmas? Hell's bells! Didn't you get my letter?"

Christmas Special Shopping Trolley.

'Deal with it.'

Santa Laughing.

'What's the torch doing in the Christmas cake.'

'C'mon in Rudolph, these ain't no reindeer games.'