Festive Pun Lover Pillows

"OK. You're the Ghost of Christmas Present. Quite amusing. Now go away!"

'Apparently the thieves were looking for the gold, frankincense and myrrh.'

Secret agents exchange Christmas greetings.

'No presents, children, because know it all Santa lost all the money on 'Christmas Cracker' in the 2.30 at Haydock.'

'We don't work on Christmas. You can celebrate the holidays with your family!'

"You'll have to guide your own sleigh tonight - I'm nowhere near fully charged yet."

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"It can't be much of a life working all day, but at least he gets to wear a stripey jersey."

"The eggnog fountain is a bad idea."

"And my client will be seeking significant damages for being mistakenly placed in the naughty column!"

'Maybe there is something in all this global warming stuff.'

Snowman in hospital bed with snow globe I.V.

'I see adventure in your future. Yes. You're going to be a culinary adventure.'

A Creature WAS Stirring

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.

The marketing is out there now. People all know the pizzas are prepared on the premises. So why no customers?

'I get that reaction a lot.'

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

'I'm writing you a prescription for some people soup.'

'How 'bout you come back and say that to me in he spring?'

Accept cookies?

'In the circumstances, I think we should skip the housewarming party.'

"I washed my kilt last night , now I can't do a fling with it!"

North Pole.

"Of course you're bored, sweetie. It's the fin de siècle."

The static electric eel is very rare.

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

"Something that makes me look unfit for human consumption."

"Waiter, there aren't any flies in my soup!"

'You give me goose bumps!'

'It's for my teacher. Do you have one with love spelled right?'

'No, I said put the money in the Caymen Islands.'

"Remember I promised you some fun and games in the bedroom?"

A robber halds up a hair salon with a hairdryer pointed at the customers - 'Hand over all your hair restorer or I'll blow you away!'

Third eye