Festive Joke Lover Pillows

"I just said that his parsnip wasn't orange enough."

Mistletoe

"Sorry, you're going to have to take a urine test."

"I may have to give up this business. The gift taxes are killing me!"

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

Elfie Stick

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

Well... Tis the season to be jolly!

"The eggnog fountain is a bad idea."

"I could get used to working remotely."

"And my client will be seeking significant damages for being mistakenly placed in the naughty column!"

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.

'Maybe there is something in all this global warming stuff.'

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

"Then you just run a VLOOKUP against the Naughty column."

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

Christmas on Other Planets.

A centipede's Christmas stockings

"As you can see, I've learned the alphabet."

A few post-Christmas options for Santa.

"I've made a terrible mistake."

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

The Reindeer Strike

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

Cat Waits For Mouse To Come And Kiss Under The Mistletoe

'I get that reaction a lot.'

'I am the ghost of Christmas future...with fries!'

"We don't use good and bad lists anymore. Now we have stupid, really stupid and completely nuts lists."

Rudolph the brown-nosed reindeer.

Merry Sisyphus - Christmas pudding being pushed up a mountain.

Thanksgiving Game Highlights