Festive Formality Friend Pillows

"'Season's Greetings' looks O.K. to me. Let's run it by the legal department."

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

"Home depot."

'He wants to close the deal with a handshake. What do you think about that?'

Santa Dog

Hold those deer to you near to you this Christmas.

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

Reindeer

Christmas Hugs

3 Pointless Things To Do At Christmas: Add a little festivity to your favourite fast food/Look up an old friend/Murder the Scotch.

Brahms and Liszt at Christmas!

"Miss Penny to inquire about the tardiness of evening kibble."

'Do you have an appointment?'

"In this corporation, Mr. Taylor, at this level we do not do shirtsleeves."

"How can I word this Christmas card to my boss without wishing him a merry Christmas?"

Shelf on an elf

Bureaucratic castle

"Well, if you expect me to be good, you'll have to bring me something better than the rubbish I got last year!"

"It's our fault. We put out milk & cookies and now we can't get rid of him."

'Where were you on the night of October 31st?'

'Number two - can you say: 'Screw the milk and cookies...where's the VCR?' In a cheerful, jolly voice?'

'Uh oh! Santa brought the kids a pet cat!'

'We'll soon know whether or not the Easter rabbit is real.'

How it began: Mr. & Mrs. Clause

Xmas

"May your year be pear-fect."

"What happens under the mistletoe stays under the mistletoe."

'This is a magnificent restaurant. Which fork should I use to comb my hair?'

"I'd like to welcome you all to today's Easter service!"

'Is that your wife's anniversary present?' - 'Yes, it's an annual report on our marriage.'

Have a cool yule!

"December 25, 1776..."

Santa Romance

Sign on desk reads: 'Business spoken here.'

"I'm not drunk! I'm jush looking for my car keyish."