Festive Finance Observer Gifts

Christmas shopping empties a shopper's pocket.

Tree in Dollar Shape.

'Ho,ho,ho, but can you be more specific?'

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

"I know it's not an ideal situation, Samantha, but how else are we going to afford a 160 gigabyte laptop, a top of the range mobile and a Playstation 3 for the kids presents?"

"You really clean up on these mileage deductions, don't you."

Help! Have to pay back a big world bank loan.

"Just as I feared. Tariffs."

Dollar Sign Christmas Tree.

"Oh, as long as he needs you, Santa's a great guy. But once things slow down and he wants a little vacation time with Mrs. C., it's 'goodbye North Pole, hello crappy temp job!'"

"You can't be serious about all these travel expenses in December!"

'Since you only work one night a year, it will take centuries to build up your retirement account.'

'Listen, Santa. Either you repay what you owe, or we reposses Rudolph!'

"Santa, snow is falling." "Sell snow!"

There IS a Santa Claus.

Santa using the stock exchange to keep track of stocks and bonds being good or bad as well as going up or down

'We had a white Christmas but we'll be in the red until April.'

'Stocks tumbled on the news Santa's credit rating was downgraded.'

"I'm the ghost of christmas past due."

"If you ask em this figure for cost of goods given is a little low."

The Bankrupts' Christmas Tree

Financial Christmas

'We've drunk a Christmas toast to my portfolio, now let's drink a Christmas toast to your portfolio.'

"An aluminum baseball bat? Are you kidding? With the tariffs, my raw material costs are up 25%. How about some soybeans?"

"Oh dear, Mr. Kringle. I fear we may have to put you on our naughty list."

"I think I found something in our price range!"

"Nothing under me this year. We must social distance."

"I've hung all the credit card bills on the tree, maybe that will stop you going to the sales."

"A local retail survey shows holiday sales were flat...but the consumer cash meter hit an all-time high...while the holiday confidence index took a three-point dip."

'Now there's a perfect example of something that's not cost effective. Fire him!'