Festive Aficionado Pillows

Penguin with fish shaped presents at christmas

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

'Only 251 shopping days till Christmas. . .'

'What? -- You didn't get your letter to Santa notarized?'

Library: 'The Wit & Wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge.'

'I got thirty Christmas cards today. . .Pity I can't afford to post them.'

Merry and Bright!

11th birthday

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

That one has all the batteries!

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

Mrs Claus - North Pole Dancing.

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

Yo ho ho!

"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

Cheers

Christmas sweater alternatives

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

"That's ridiculous. A red nose wouldn't work as a GPS system."

"Hmm. The lights are on, but nobody's home..."

'And that,and that,and that...'

"I've had. . . um. . . just a small sherry. . ."

"As you can see, I've learned the alphabet."

A Christmas tree self portrait

The other days of the year...

Merry Kissmas

Maypole