Fellowship Committee Member Gifts

"For your information, officer, I was not ‘texting’ – I was reviewing candidate applications for fellowship grants!"

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

'Hanson - committee of four.'

'What we need is a decision, not more foot-dragging.'

"The state of graduates literacy levels is shoking and both my colleegs agrree that there maths isn't much better."

'It may not be our usual business lunch, but it will sure impress the hell out of the budget committee.'

"Hold everything! I just thought up a terrific loophole!"

'There's an absence of leadership in this authority,we need to explore the possibility of thinking about setting up a sub-committee to look into it.'

'Okay, let's go over this again: You tell me your great ideas, I repeat them back to you, then you tell me I have a great idea and I get all the credit for it!'

"Thank you. It wasn't too 'preachy', was it?"

"There's no need to go round the table - I know who I am."

Plain English group.

"The vote is tied. Half of us think the proposed plan is astoundingly asinine, and the other half finds it stupid beyond belief. Let's try to find a middle ground here, people!"

"I guess the point I'm trying to make is, calling the committee on Progress and Evolution a bunch of know-it-all nincompoops might have felt good when you said it, but..."

"The Board just wants to be sure you're well supported."

"I don't mind emotional trauma if I can turn it into a really funny anecdote."

"The steering-committee three are we. Run it by us, and we'll see."

'That's it, in a nutshell.'

'Excellent - it's unanimous!'

"The first goal of our ad hoc committee should be to learn Latin."

'Yeah, but would you want to have a beer with him.'

"I suppose the first thing to do is form an escape committee."

Senate ethics committee - no fatties!

'You may be chairman of the board, but the ethics committee would still like to talk to you about your trip to Vegas.'

Vicar

"Thanks a bunch. I'll just run these by our committee and pass them along."

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this damn committee.'

'So, after much wailing and gnashing of teeth, the financial report is approved.'

'I think we should form a committee to look into this 'individual initiative' thing.'

Hudibras - 9 - The committee.

'Community wok?'

'Mr.Shumway here is our visiting ethicist.'

'We have 10 billion dollars sitting around. Let's give it to the country that calls the United States the most names.'

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this committee.'

'All those in favor of making more loans, raise your hands.' (staff's hands are tied to chairs).