Federal Investigations T-Shirts

Trumpled

The Anti-Agent

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

"True crime meets reality TV"

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

He's making a list --- Holmes solves cases quicker when he itemizes deductions.

Acme-5000 Lie Detector

Rumors, lies and innuendo.

'Then my brother said he'd like to bury the hatchet...'

Journalism student ponders which course he wants to major in.

Cameron uncomfortable hanging out with his inquisitor.

Office of the Special Investigator: Stepped out to follow the 'money trail'.

'So, in room 1 we sweat them. 2 is for grilling, 3 is for roasting. We leave them to simmer in room 4...'

"The DNA sample from the mink fibres found in the suspect's car matched the DNA sample from the mink coat found at the scene of the crime, so I'm thinking, maybe these minks were twins?"

Expanded Limited Investigation

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

"Why don't we call you 'Deeper Throat'?"

Newton's Law and Order.

CSI Wonderland. (Photographer takes a picture of a cracked Humpty Dumpty. Investigators collect evidence from the scene.)

The Robert Mueller Rosetta Stone

"He did it!"

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."

Police man stands guard at a murder scene in Egyptology department of a museum.

"They've solved the cause of death of Richard III."

"I'm a brilliant stalker and love photography, so I thought: why not?"